If I ever have the chance to meet Tracy Morgan at some bar in Manhattan, the first question I’ll have for him is, “Were you ever a foot messenger for Archer Services?” When I was in High School that was one of my after hours jobs. Worked right off Wall Street, at the Pearl St. office. Among the cast of characters at this place was a short, dark skinned, dude from the Bronx named Tracy. He always had jokes, and walking down the street, you could count on ‘Tracy’ volunteering to impregnate, eat, sniff, or lick any woman coming his way.

As you know, that’s a Tracy Morgan staple.

I was only there a year and saw this guy off and on because of my school schedule. To this day, I swear ‘Tracy’ and Tracy Morgan are the same guy. Add that Tracy Morgan’s career didn’t start bubbling until the early 90’s on The Uptown Comedy Club and the numbers make sense.

Numbers that might not make sense - to storybook romantics - is Tracy Morgan’s pending divorce from his wife of 20+ years, Sabina. That’s not breaking news of any kind: because of his drinking, they broke up last year, they got back together, and broke up again. Try finding references to a judge handing over half of that Morgan fortune, there are none. So maybe they’ll work it out. Or maybe they won’t.

In this month’s Vibe, Tracy Morgan, with a cheez grin, spoke on the split in the past tense.

“That’s one of the biggest regrets of my life. My wife walked away from me because I was out of control. Twenty one years is a long time to be married - I feel we beat the statistics. We got to raise our children together. I just try my best one day at a time. This is a very interesting chapter in my life, with the success of 30 Rock, and a new Ice Cube movie getting ready to blow. It’s a high and a low for me, but that’s life - up and down. When it goes straight you flatline.”

That’s vanilla wisdom you can use in multiple situations.