I’ve never been able to sit through an entire American Idol season. The songs and style of singing make it unbearable. For the most part I watch the goofballs during the auditions and try to guess which one of the many faces with actual voices will be among the final 12, if not the winner.

Last night I checked in to see how Diana Ross was going to contribute.. and see new Idol Sensation Sanjaya Malakar.

First of all, if there is any justice Melinda Doolittle will be the winner.

2nd - LaKisha Jones.

Blake Timberlake could make some noise.

Simon, Paula and Yo Dog killed him last night, but I was feeling Blake’s electro-funkdafied update.

Not serious about him.

Most of the ‘singers’ sound terrible. They’re flat, lifeless, but not lacking in confidence. Which is crazy because Melinda can sing and she always has her mouth open in shock when people tell her she can.

Throw in the little porn girl that got kicked off last week, a lot of the contestants look the part, but sound horrendous, awful, like shit, to use Cowell speak. You gotta believe either the real singers are taking a different route to platinum or talent just doesn’t matter anymore. Get your sunglasses and barechested Rich Boy on.

It’s not entirely Idol’s fault, leave the vote up to ‘the people’ and eventually the Jennifer Hudson’s get kicked to the curb and your Sanjaya Malakar’s are wiggling around the big stage, because, well, they’re funny to watch.

This kid is shit.

He murdered a Diana Ross classic.

American Idol is supposed to be a serious competition.

Here lil Sanjaya is doing a cruise ship act.

He’d be a big hit at the office Christmas party… but performing for 20 million viewers?

Ahh.. but then you see his little smile, eyes peeking from under that week’s freshly sprayed hairdo, a youthful innocence and naive enthusiasm.. “Ain’t no mountain highhhh enoughhhh..” you get wrapped up in it.

He’s so terrible people are cheering him on.

Like the 12th man that comes off the bench in a basketball game with a few minutes to go, doesn’t matter how many bricks he’s laying, the crowd is behind him on every shot.

You’re not gonna win with that guy on the court for four quarters.

As I write this an American Idol vote monitoring site  is predicting that Sanjaya survives tonight’s vote. He’ll receive the most votes after Lakisha Jones and Melinda Doolittle. He gets third place!?!

If Sanjaya goes deep into the competition - 8 to 6 deep - American Idol’s credibility will be barbecued. Done. And all the little teenage girls voting for him - it has to be them and a little Indian pride mixed with the “how funny would that be’s” - will make that happen, thinking it’s cute.
I don’t know about cute, but it would be funny. Imagine the final two is Sanjaya and Melinda?

That’s when I get to txting.. you know you want to hear a Sanjaya album.